Festive Twin Times

The first Christmas for our family of 5 was definitely different.  The twins take up so much of our time that we barely noticed Christmas day was happening.  We spent it at my Dad's, this is always guaranteed to be a hectic day with people coming and going, and this year was no exception.

The day started as usual letting Holly open presents whilst eating chocolate biscuits and wearing our PJ's, this year however she also got to open the extra ones Santa had left for Max and Fia.   We then proceeded to dress Max and Fia in their outfits, introducing Mr and Mrs Santa (Lee doesn't like the title Mr and Mrs as he thinks its weird, I however think its cute)

These outfits were from Asda and were cheap enough to be able to have a one day use, not sure what these will be used for now as there are no plans for a second set of twins.

Anyway, we had a lovely day that went all too quick.  Before we knew it 7pm had arrived and they were washed and in bed, this however meant we could relax with a glass or two of wine before retiring to bed in preparation to do it all again the next day with Lees family.

We now have loads of toys and clothes and no space to put them, however we are very grateful to have such lovely generous families.

These activity centres, chosen by Nanny and Grandad, are a favourite of both Max and Fia at the moment, hopefully a review will follow on here shortly (if I stick to my new years resolutions).

Hopefully next Christmas will be more fun packed with 2 toddlers running around, I'm already looking forward to it.

where's my life???

I've done this before so when deciding to try for a baby I knew exactly what to expect I had it all planned finish my degree, do a PGCE and find a job in teaching as well as look after a family.  I then thought we could maybe, finance (and Lee) allowing, try for a 3rd...BUT...then I had twins!  Childcare for 2 babies would be more than I could earn plus I'm not sure I could find the time to do a PGCE whilst looking after 2 babies, Holly, Lee, 2 cats and a house so for the time I have resigned myself to the stay at home Mum (SAHM) status,

I returned to work when Holly was 6 weeks old so have never experienced the SAHM status before and I was really looking forward to doing all the things I couldn't do with Holly however its not as fun as I thought, in fact its bloody boring!  for the first few weeks I thought Lee had it tough, going to work and missing out on all the cute things Max and Fia do however now I'm...can't believe I'm saying this...jealous!  I'm jealous he is getting a life, he speaks to adults daily and its not always about the babies, I'm jealous that he actually enjoys his job.  I'm angry that I don't, I'm angry that when he comes home he is too tired to help, I'm angry that I never get a break, I'm angry that my life is boring, I'm angry that I feel like this.

Here's the real crunch...if Lee and I had to swap roles, if I had to go to work and Lee stayed at home there is no way I would do it.  I just want a peak at life from time to time, an hour off a week would be great, for that one hour I would feel like me. 

I guess you can't have everything after all...

4 months on..

Well...we made it to 4 months and I really can't believe how quickly its gone!!   It feels like only yesterday we found out we were having twins and some days I look down and can't believe there are 2 little babies in front of me.

Its amazing how much their own personalities have developed already, I do wonder how much of their differences are down to being boy/girl however I strongly believe in nurture so when I here "oh its because his a boy" I roll my eyes and reply "maybe" as some conversations just fall on deaf ears.

Fia has grown the most and is developing an immense amount of physical strength...she holds her head well and can lay on her belly (reluctantly) and push upwards.  She has a smile for everyone even if she is unwell (that didn't help to convince the doctor she was genuinely ill a few weeks back), she loves attention and would rather have a cuddle than play by herself.  She obviously adores and depends on her brother and is always looking to see where he is.

Max, one the other hand, wouldn't always notice if Fia wasn't there.  He talks to her, in their funny little language, whenever she is in his eye line but doesn't actively seek her out.  Instead he chooses to play by himself thrashing around on his play mat.  Strength wise he is slightly weaker than Fia, still looking like a nodding dog when trying to support his own head although he is beginning to show some interest in sitting upright.  His grumpy face breaks into a smile when someone talks to him and that person is often treated to a round of laughter if the talking continues.

Two beautiful, gorgeous independent babies and today I can't believe how lucky I am...tomorrow, however, is another story.

Park on your drive you inconsiderate little man!!

This is one major rant that I'm hoping to calm down from once it is on paper.  I live in a end terrace house with no drive way...the only house in the street that doesn't have one.  Every other house has a drive although for some treason they all use them to hoard cars not in use meaning they then need to park on the road.  The man that lives opposite has 2 driveways and space for about 6 or 7 cars...and despite only 2 people living in his house they do have this amount of cars.  Anyway everyday he arrives home from work around 3, the same time I leave to collect Holly from school, and for some reason he feels the need to park outside my house ignoring the big empty space on his drive.  Now don't get me wrong....anyone can park where they want but what angers me is 1) that he doesn't just use one space he parks in such a way it prevents 2 other cars being able to park, and, 2) he doesn't need the space HE HAS A DRIVE!!!  He has several times seen me stumble with a car seat in each hand to my car from my front door and then back again so he knows that getting the twins in the car by myself is a challenge yet he still insists on parking right outside my house.  I am beginning to wonder what happened to consideration from others, parking is difficult in most streets these days due to the massive increase in cars per household over recent years.  Driveways have gone some way in reducing this issue but if people don't use them it is so frustrating for others.  I would knock and speak to him about it but what do I say?  "Hey mister you can't park there"  well actually he can....all I ask for is some consideration but if he doesn't have it without being asked then I very much doubt he will have any more if I do ask.  Some people are just born pig ignorant...OK maybe that was uncalled for but I do feel a bit better for it!

Naughty children or SEN

When carrying out study for my degree I gained a particular interest in special educational needs (SEN). After three years and two fantastic lecturers I can honestly say my perspective on 'naughty children' has changed.  Naughty child has never been a phrase I am particularly fond of and I tolerate the term even less now.  I feel that if a child is not behaving then we should look at why instead of giving them a label that is unfortunately carried through their whole education process and often becomes a self fore filling prophecy.  I give you an example:
I have a lovely friend who's son 'suffers' with Aspergers Syndrome.  I say "suffers with" loosely as I feel its not the AS that causes the suffering but sadly those around him.  AS is a condition, more common in boys (a ratio of 4:1) that comes in varying degrees, with various combinations of difficulties but its main effect is on interaction and communication with others.  My friends son is a recent diagnosis despite the fact that she has always felt his development differed to that of other boys when she finally got him a diagnoses the battle begun to have him excepted by others.  Unfortunately he is one boy that others look at and think naughty, I have been to his defence many a time with other adults who simply do not understand his condition- If I hear one more person say "he's got to learn to conform" I may well scream.  Why does it have to conform? To make it easier for you?  What about making it easier for him?  Anyway, this is outside the classroom where knowledge is limited on all areas of education at least he surely must be getting help inside the classroom.  Well....it seems NOT! His mum is fighting daily to get him extra support whilst teachers, who often have no training or experience in these areas, fail to understand him which is in effect causing them to fail in educating him. 
I wonder when the status of cognitive disabilities will ever reach that of physical disabilities.  Don't get me wrong all areas of disability are greatly misunderstood but if its physical at least most people will try to adapt and accommodate (not always in the best way) but for many with cognitive disabilities I suspect the attempt is not made.

I hope when I finally get into the teaching profession (Tories permitting) I am understanding and accommodating.  I hope I have the thought and inclination to research conditions effecting children in my care...on top of this I hope I use my time and energy to understand the children in my care as individuals.

Catch Up...beware many random thoughts!!

Well I haven't posted for a while as time has just been disappearing, having twins=busy, busy, busy.  Anyway I finally have time for a catch up so here goes...

Lee started a new job today as a games tester.  This is great for him as it is a step into the industry he would like to build a career in so although he isn't in the right area its a start.  The money is not great, he has far to travel and he has to work shifts but its a means to an end.  Anyway his new shift pattern is the reason why I have time to type.  He is working til 11 so I need to stay up for the 1030 feed...giving me time to catch up on things other than sleep.  I'm pleased he got this job and the timing couldn't have been better, lets hope it gets him where he wants.

Babies are doing well.  Fia is sleeping through the night nicely just wish I could say the same for Max  He still insists on waking around 4 and I am struggling to get him to brake the habit.  Can't complain too much though as dealing with one baby at 4am is a lot easier than dealing with two!

Bottles!!!!!! I feel like I wash hundreds of them, its constant!! I would love someone to do his for me, just for a day (Lee this is a hint at you).  I would also love someone to wash and iron for me, do a bit of hoovering, clean the bathroom...I suspect however this isn't going to happen.

I shouted at Holly tonight and I'm really not sure why.  I think sometimes the noise effects my thinking and I just snap.  I did apologise but I feel guilty-that little emotion us mums permanently feel for some reason or another- I shall have to try harder I think.

Slightly different subject but today the government announced that they will be cutting child benefit for individuals who earn £44k.  This won't effect us unfortunately (I use this word as earning this would be a position we would love to be in at the moment) however seeing peoples reactions has been interesting.  £44k is not a massive amount of money but it is plenty to survive on, I have been on Netmums and so many people suggest it is not enough.  There also seems to be a massive class divide which is a real shame.  I also have to add that I there appears to be a massive irony in the fact that Tories biggest voters are middle income earners yet they are also the category taking the biggest financial hit at present.  I'm sure though they are just easing us in and we will all suffer at their hands...fast forward 5 years and I suspect they will be losing the election.

Lastly..we are looking to book a holiday for next year.  Lees parents are off to Cornwall in July so we figured we would join them.  Need to find a holiday home or a caravan somewhere preferably as cheap as possible so its time to start hunting.

I know this is a random post but just thought I would do some thinking out loud to ease me back in. So until next time...

Jab day

Its been a couple of weeks but I have a spare ten minutes..yes ten whole minutes...so thought I would spend it posting.  The twins and their jabs today and I'm not sure whether the waiting room experience was better or worse than the time spent in the nurses room.  Max and Fia were both hungry so a bit restless (although I guess I'm lucky they weren't screaming).  I spent the best part of the wait avoiding eye contact with everyone in the hope that I wouldn't have to have the usual conversations- no they are not identical (stupid question), yes they are good (although I wonder what the response would be if I replied "well this one is evil"), yes they are big due to being full term babies etc etc etc.  Anyway I manged roughly 10 minutes before the lady sitting opposite decided she was an expert and would give me some advice on how important routine is for twins...and NO she did NOT have twins herself!!!! I smiled pleasantry's whilst secretly wanting to smack her one and was relieved when the intercom called "Max and Fia Warren Relton to the nurses room". Well, the tale ends here as my ten minutes are up...